The Parisian Café-teria

It is an accepted fact that American school cafeteria food is bad. Not just nutritionally bad and probably-infected-with-E.Coli bad, but nasty bad.

The French would never eat this. Not even poor Parisian children would eat this. The French public school system provides 132 different menus for its students over the course of the year, each one of which features a four-course meal (hors d'oeuvre, a salad, a main course, and a dessert). There is no flavored milk and no high fructose corn syrup. Just 100% French meat and lots of vegetables.

The school system virtually ensures that French children are taught from an early age to appreciate good food. Schoolchildren try many of the country's hundreds of varieties of cheeses before they are ten years old. By the time they are out of high school, they are fully prepared to receive degrees in food-snobbery (a requirement for any true Parisian). Of course, this kind of menu comes at a cost: the public educational system in France pays an average of three times more per student on meals than American public schools do.

Having raised French schoolchildren with such a strong appreciation of food, it's obvious that Ramen noodles are not a big college student staple on this side of the Atlantic. Dégoûtant, ça! No, the French university students have cafeterias too, and they are très bon.

Any university student in Paris (French citizen or not, enrolled at a fancy-schmancy grand école or a community college) is eligible to receive reduced-price meals at the CROUS restaurants throughout the city.  Extremely reduced-price: a three-course meal will cost you 3.05 euros ($3.85). If you're still hungry, you can add on extra courses -- perhaps a slice of brie -- for about $0.50 each. And the food is excellent.

The meat is only French-origin, and the vegetables are organic whenever possible. Each restaurant employs a nutritional staff to make sure that the students are receiving all the good foods we need to absorb everything the French professors try to shove in our brains.

This was my 3.05 euro meal yesterday. There are three different serving lines to choose from. I went with the "unhealthy food" line, because it was a Wednesday.

A salad of arugula, roquefort, walnuts, and tomatoes, dressed in a mustard vinaigrette.  With a whole-grain pizza with zucchini, chicken, and olives. This is the healthiest unhealthy meal I've ever had. And also (not pictured) un produit laitier, which translates to "EAT YOUR CALCIUM." The French like to push milk products a lot.

I quickly learned from the students around me that the proper way to eat a pizza is by knife and fork, cut into miniature little slices that you are absolutely not supposed to touch with your hands. This is not New York, folks. Getting pizza grease on your hands would be very uncivilized.

I traded my yogurt for half of a chocolate bar. Because hey, if I'm going to eat lunch in a cafeteria, all of the fourth grade exchange rate rules apply.